What to Watch: Spooky Season

for fraidy-cats and thrill-seekers alike

My heart may belong to the summer, but my soul belongs to spooky season. Horror is my favourite genre, or at least, the one that speaks to me the most, so October is a real fun time for me. To that end, I’m sharing some (several) recommendations for different types of horror movies to watch as we draw nearer to Halloween.

I know that not everybody loves to be scared as much as I do, though, so each sub-genre here has a recommendation for wherever you fall on the spooky spectrum:

Fraidy-cats: these are nominally horror movies, but could just as easily be described as comedies or action-thrillers. The chances of nightmares are near zero here.

Terror tourists: movies for when you’re looking for a decent scare, but you still want to sleep easily that night.

Thrill-seekers: you want something terrifying, disturbing, or gruesome. Something that will haunt you long after the credits roll.

Let the spooky times roll!

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1. ‘90s Sleepover Vibes

   1. Fraidy-cats: Hocus Pocus (1993). This is well-worn territory at this point, but some things are classics for a reason. This weird and weirdly horny children’s movie has the good sense to stop in its tracks for a Bette Midler song, and that’s alright with me. Fun fact: the guy who plays Billy Butcherson has probably scared the shit out of you in some Guillermo del Toro movie or other. Or a McDonald’s ad.

   2. Terror tourists: The Craft (1996). Another Gen X/Millennial standby, The Craft is one of those movies that makes such a good case for female anger in the first two acts that the entire third act, in which it demonizes and punishes its angriest female character, feels utterly unhinged. The older I get, the more I realize: Nancy was right.

      

      Fairuza Balk could not and cannot be contained.

   3. Thrill-seekers: Host (2020). A pandemic-era horror movie that takes place entirely on Zoom, and keeps it short enough (like, 57 minutes) that the premise doesn’t wear out its welcome. Even better if you watch on a laptop, so the virtual seance and ensuing havoc plays out exactly the way it would if you were fool enough to participate yourself.

2. Creature Features

   1. Fraidy-cats: Monster Squad (1987). An extremely ‘80s love letter to the classic Universal monsters, but especially Frankenstein’s monster (here named Frankie, because, ‘80s). There’s a heroic dog (he lives!), an adorably precocious little sister, and the contagious sense of adventure that I’m supposed to get from The Goonies but never did because those kids were playing around in dirt way too much.

   2. Terror tourists: The Thing (1982). This one is admittedly closer to thrill-seeker category, but The Descent edges it out in terms of sheer pants-shittery. Kurt Russell is at the height of his powers here, as is visual effects director Rob Bottin. If you don’t like gooey gory practical effects, skip this one. (But don’t tell me you skipped it; it’s in my top 4.)

   3. Thrill-seekers: The Descent (2005). I can’t watch this one at night. I can’t watch it with the lights off. The only thing that makes me feel safe while I watch this movie is to remind myself that spelunking-based horrors are skinny people problems.

      

      Everyone is trapped. Not me though. Y’all stay safe.

3. Non-Romero Zombies

   1. Fraidy-cats: One Cut of the Dead (2017). A hilarious and heartfelt low-budget zombie movie about making a low-budget zombie movie that ends with the making of the making of the low-budget zombie movie. Just a really fun time that left me with the warm fuzzies.

   2. Terror tourists: The Girl With All the Gifts (2016). Way fewer warm fuzzies to be had, I’ll be honest. This one goes in a different direction that most zombie movies, and has the best wham line of any movie on this list.

   3. Thrill-seekers: Train to Busan (2016). To me, this movie is perfect, and my wasted heart will love it until I am a zombie myself. But I will never watch it again. I’m sensitive to: strained father-daughter relationships; children in peril; and beloved characters sacrificing themselves for their loved ones. And this movie is the story of a deadbeat dad riding a train with his young daughter, who becomes imperiled by a nasty running zombie outbreak that necessitates a lot of sacrifice for loved ones.
      

4. Haunted Houses

   1. Fraidy-cats: Hausu (1977). Truly one of the most catshit movies I’ve ever seen. Best watched with a group of people who are coming in relatively cold but ready to be delighted and gobsmacked in equal measure.

      

      The less I say about it, the better.

   2. Terror tourists: His House (2020). One of the saddest and best movies on this list. A depely felt portrayal of refugee life in England, and my favourite flavour of ghost story—one about coming to terms with your guilt and regret. Wunmi Mosaku gives a crackerjack lead performance, so if you wanted more of her after Lovecraft Country, run don’t walk.

   3. Thrill-seekers: The House of the Devil (2009). Back when Greta Gerwig was still playing the goofy best friend, Ti West put out this note-perfect pastiche of late ‘70s/early ‘80s spooky stuff. It’s a slow build, to be sure, but when all hell breaks loose it really breaks loose.
      

5. Slasher Chic

   1. Fraidy-cats: Freaky (2020). A body-swap comedy disguised as a slasher. Vince Vaughn gives a hilarious performance as a teenage girl trapped in Vince Vaughn’s body, though his performance has basically nothing to do with the teenage girl he swaps bodies with.

   2. Terror tourists: You’re Next (2011). A hybrid home invasion/slasher pic that goes in some fun and unexpected directions. Star Sharni Vinson of Step Up 3D fame (?) makes for a credibly badass final girl who makes things bloodily difficult for the killers.

   3. Thrill-seekers: Black Christmas (1974). Arguably the one that kicked off the whole genre, this movie does more for me than any Halloween movie ever could. Anchored by a really lovable cast and a surprisingly timeless backstory. The House of the Devil is very much in loving conversation with this one.
      

6. The Killer is One of Us

   1. Fraidy-cats: Bodies Bodies Bodies (2022). A Gen Z horror-comedy for the ages. All the characters are perfect parodies of annoying 20-somethings, and every single line delivery from Rachel Sennott is a masterpiece. The killer reveal also makes perfect, bleakly hilarious sense.

      

   2. Terror tourists: Ready or Not (2019). Samara Weaving is the owner of three of the all-time best movie screams, and she uses them all to great effect here. Another dynamite ensemble cast, with a pointedly good Andie MacDowell performance and Adam Brody doing his best Adam Brody. Great for if you feel awkward around your in-laws and could use some catharsis.

   3. Thrill-seekers: Identity (2003). From the John Cusack back catalog. For my money, this is an under-seen camp exercise in Agatha Christie-dom. Amanda Peet gets a rare starring role as the only person in the movie responding like a human would to a series of increasingly improbable murders happening over the course of a few hours; which is to say, she increasingly falls apart and does not apologize for it.
      

7. Woman on the Verge of a Menty B

   1. Fraidy-cats: Ma (2019). This one is just too campy for me to take seriously as horror, but that doesn’t mean it’s not a fun time. All of the adult actors are all in on all the cheese, which balances out the very boring teenagers; but special attention must be paid to Octavia Spencer, who collaborated with the director to create this role.

   2. Terror tourists: The Night House (2020). Part of the Depressed Rebecca Hall Cinematic Universe, this is the sort of movie that Jenna Ortega’s Scream character would call “an amazing meditation on grief.” And it is actually stunning at times, mostly thanks to Rebecca Hall.

   3. Thrill-seekers: Possession (1981). If you only know Sam Neill as Dr. Alan Grant, this movie will knock your socks off. Actually, it will knock your socks off regardless, because it is absolutely bizarre and almost defies categorizing. Isabelle Adjani famously invented acting in her notorious subway scene.

      

      The horrors of public transit.

8. Gotta Get Outta Here

   1. Fraidy-cats: Escape Room (2019). To be honest, this movie makes escape rooms look like two tons of fun. A dwindling cast of strangers making their way through several stunning and deadly set pieces will always be a good time in my book, but the violence is disappointingly (to me) PG-13.

   2. Terror tourists: 1408 (2007). John Cusack is really doing numbers in this list, huh? And he is so oddly well-suited to Stephen King’s whole vibe. This movie is more heartbreaking than it is scary, though it has one phenomenally well-executed jump scare that sent me and my popcorn flying in the theatre. (Apologies again to the AMC Boston Common 19 for the mess.)

   3. Thrill-seekers: Green Room (2015). Patrick Stewart plays the leader of a murderous neo-Nazi skinhead club in the Pacific Northwest, and he absolutely crushes. One of the few movies that makes me feel legitimately claustrophobic. The violence is intimate and realistic, which makes it even more terrifying.

What other horror sub-genres would you like recommendations for?